I was recently listening to this song “Scars to your Beautiful” by Alessia Cara. In its lyrics, there’s this part that says: “you don't have to change a thing, the world can change its heart”, which led to writing this blog.
Like me, you probably grew up under the impression that you can not be your whole true self. Mostly, because it doesn’t quite align with the world’s demands of conformity and perfection. Or at least, that’s what you believe. But what if your true self was, and still is, aligned to something? Something greater than what meets the eye?
Perhaps you find yourself grappling with the belief that you need to be someone different in order to be liked or accepted. Perhaps you have been struggling with this since recent years, or perhaps you’ve been experiencing this your whole life. Whichever the case may be, these feelings can become a painful struggle that touches the very core of your being. They may even be having an impact in your close relationships.
In this article, I invite you to embark on the journey of overcoming this belief and embracing love and self-acceptance as the keys to the fulfilling life you deserve.
Are You Wearing a Mask?
Chances are that, if you aren’t feeling safe in our skin, you’ll be putting on a mask. A mask you may feel will conform to societal expectations and hide your personal traits, giving you some sense of safety and/or comfort. Yet, beneath that mask lies your true essence, yearning to be seen and accepted. And, isn’t this lack of self-acceptance what’s at the core of you feeling rejected?
What if this feeling is actually starting the minute you first reject yourself? And, how can another accept you, when you aren’t accepting of yourself first? Think about it: are you not your own best marketer? Isn’t how you are presenting yourself to the world having an impact in how others may be perceiving you?
Love and Self-Acceptance: Embracing Your Uniqueness
Since the dawn of time, society has always held rules over what is perfection. Every time period, every civilization, has had its own idea of what “perfect” is. Oftentimes this cannon can be taken so at heart, that it fosters a relentless pursuit of certain flawlessness. However, embracing your uniqueness, though challenging, can become the greatest act of love and self-acceptance you can give to yourself. Soon, this pursuit of love and self-acceptance will bring you to embrace this journey of self-discovery. Doing so will help you feel safer and more confident in who you are as an individual.
Cultivating Vulnerability
Vulnerability is often misconstrued as weakness, yet it is the cornerstone of authentic connection. It is in moments of vulnerability that we strip away the layers of pretense, allowing others to witness our true selves. Embracing love and self-acceptance means embracing vulnerability, bravely revealing our fears and insecurities, and trusting that we will be met with compassion and understanding.
This, of course, is a process, and you should always make sure that you can trust the people you are choosing to open up to. Not everyone is genuinely interested in building a true, loving relationship. Learning to discern who you allow to come close to you will build the foundation of self-trust required to feel safer in all your relationships. Especially the one that you are having with yourself.
Navigating Rejection
The fear of rejection can hold you captive, preventing you from fully expressing yourself for fear of not being accepted. These fears can overpower you, especially if we don’t know how to navigate them, that we may transcend them. Living in fear is not fun. Neither is feeling like you can not be your true self. So, when it comes to fear, it is always advised to seek professional help. Breaking free from fear is one of the main keys in allowing your self-expression to flourish. And for that, you need to feel safe in doing so.
Learning and remembering that rejection is not a reflection of your worth is also fundamental. The more you learn to not take rejection personally, the easier it is to see it as a redirection towards those who are meant to truly appreciate and cherish you. Navigating rejection with grace requires a deep sense of love and self-acceptance, knowing that our value is not contingent upon the approval of others, but something you can always choose to cultivate within.
The Liberating Power of Authenticity
When you embrace your authentic self, you free yourself from the shackles of societal expectations and self-imposed limitations. Authenticity allows you to forge genuine connections built on mutual respect, understanding and acceptance. It is a journey of self-discovery and self-love, where you can learn to embrace every facet of your being with compassion and kindness.
Through love and self-acceptance, you can learn to peel back the layers of pretense and reveal the beauty of your true essence.
